Good Bones star, Mina Starsiak Hawk is reflecting on the past year and opening up about the tragic loss of her beloved "bright light" sister-in-law, Stefanie Hawk. In a post shared to her Instagram on Sunday morning, the 35-year-old HGTV personality posted a slideshow of images led by a poem from author Christy Ann Martine, Hawk confessed she has been going through old pictures and posts from people about 2020, "for better or worse" and thinking about her own year of events.
"Right as Covid hit hard, we lost Stef; way too young, far too soon for what I needed her for and far to soon for what my family needed her for," Starsiak Hawk wrote. "She was a bright light for us in a time she herself didn't see much light. Losing her parents, Rick and Sally, affected her deeply. It did all of us, but Stef in particular. So as I'm sitting here, rocking Charlie in the dark, crying, reading these words I found saved in my phone, I'm both eternally grateful for 2020 while on the other hand, hate it for all it took from my family and this world."
View this post on Instagram
Starsiak Hawk went on to state how 2020 "took Stef," sharing how it also robbed her family of gathering around to celebrate her life and "share our love for her as she so deserved" following strict social distancing guidelines in the state of Indiana. "It took the joy from my husband that he had just managed to find again after losing his parents. Every celebration had a dark shadow over it, unable to forget the people not present. It took so much from so many people," she said.
However, the mom-of-two adds how thankful she is for the past year, especially in welcoming her daughter, Charlie Drew. "Every time I look at her I see Stef, for better or for worse," she said. "Some days it makes me cry and some days it's the bright light in a really shitty moment. Stef's gone, but I see her every day... and for that, I am so grateful."
She continued: "2020 challenged us all in so many ways. I've always said growing up, I'd never change a thing, not an experience.... not even the s—y ones [because] then I wouldn't be who I am; I wouldn’t have met my husband and had my beautiful kids. But I think that's also just the right thing to say whether or not you believe it, [because] you can't change any of it."
The Indianapolis native concludes by writing that for "better or worse," she wouldn't "change a thing" that happened in 2020. "And I'm just going to keep saying it until I believe it again," she wrote.
Fans took to the comments section to express their condolences with love once more and share relatable stories of grief in the past year. Starsiak Hawk's husband, Steve also commented writing, "Well written boo. I love you," while her younger brother Tad Starsiak admitted, "Feeling it too sis [heart emoji] she was the best of us. Love you."
Last March, Starsiak Hawk revealed her sister-in-law Stefanie had died suddenly. While not revealing any details surrounding the death, she wrote that due to the pandemic, the family could not hold a large gathering and asked fans to donate to The Asher House in memory of Stefanie.
"There is nothing to say that makes it easier or better, especially in this time where our access to loved ones and friends is so limited," Starsiak Hawk wrote, later adding how pups were a big part of her world. "Her passion for animal rescue was just a small part of her amazing spirit. The Asher House held a special place in her heart. In lieu of flowers, we would love donations be made on her behalf."0comments
The news had come just weeks after the Good Bones star shared she was expecting her second child following infertility struggles. Starsiak Hawk and her husband, Steve, welcomed baby Charlotte Drew Hawk on Sept. 16, 2020.
If you are a fan of Good Bones, Starsiak Hawk and loving pups, you can show your support to The Asher House as well by visiting their official website to share a donation. For more on Good Bones, the stars and all your favorite HGTV shows, stay tuned to PopCulture.com for the latest.