Kellie Pickler Marks First Performance After Husband Kyle Jacobs’ Death

It’s been over a year since the death of Kellie Pickler’s husband Kyle Jacobs, and the singer just marked her first performance since the terrible tragedy. On Monday, April 22, Pickler participated in Walkin’ After Midnight: The Music of Patsy Cline at the Ryman Auditorium in Nashville, Tennessee.

Taking the stage to sing “The Woman I Am” — which she wrote with her late husband — Pickler confessed to the audience, per Rolling Stone and USA Today. “I’d be lying if I didn’t say I was incredibly nervous right now. It’s the first time I’ve been up on stage in a while.” Pickler later referred to Jacobs, saying, “I know he is here with us tonight.”

Jacobs died by suicide in February 2023, at the age of 49. His cause of death was confirmed by an autopsy. Toxicology results determined that Jacobs did not have any drugs in his system. However, he did have a history of “pseudoseizures, gastrointestinal bleeding, elevated liver enzymes, and chronic alcohol use.” According to epilepsy.com, Pseudoseizures — or psychogenic nonepileptic seizures (PNES) — “are attacks that may look like epileptic seizures but are not epileptic and instead are caused by psychological factors.”

Pickler did not break her silence on Jacobs’s death until August 2023. She issued a statement to PEOPLE, sharing gratitude for all her fans and paying tribute to her late spouse. “One of the most beautiful lessons my husband taught me was in a moment of a crisis, if you don’t know what to do, ‘do nothing, just be still,’” she said. “I have chosen to heed his advice.”

“Thank you to my family, friends, and supporters, for the countless letters, calls, and messages that you have sent my way,” the former American Idol contestant continued. “It has truly touched my soul and it’s helping me get through the darkest time in my life. As many of you have told me, you are all in my prayers.” She then shared that she is in the process of planning a memorial for Jacobs. “I am planning an intimate memorial for my husband, which will happen later this fall, that is what Kyle would have wanted,” Pickler wrote, then singing her statement, “Love & Blessings, Kellie.”

If you or someone you know is in crisis, please call or text 988 to reach the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. The previous Lifeline phone number (1-800-273-8255) will always remain available.