Former Bachelorette Hannah Brown has had a bumpy ride the last two years since appearing on the hit ABC reality series The Bachelor. Now, as a competitor on Dancing with the Stars, she's admitting that she's struggling a bit after shedding a few tears on camera during rehearsals. But her tears didn't stop there. The former Miss Alabama opened up to her fans on Instagram in a lengthy statement admitting that her experience on the dance competition was more emotional that she thought it would be.
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This experience has been harder than I could have ever imagined. When I decided to do DWTS I thought it would be a fun way to channel all my energy after a whirlwind experience as the Bachelorette. I was hopeful that the confidence I gained this year to take pride in the woman I have become would have the opportunity to shine, and I’d feel that reboot in my spirit after it took a bit of a beating after my bachelorette season. I came into this experience a little broken and confused—more than I’ve shared. Everyday has brought its challenges with my past, my fears, and the uncomfortableness of opening myself up again to be judged on something VERY scary like learning a new skill to perform each week. Last night was really defeating for me and a lot of suppressed emotions started to surface from this amazing, but grueling experience. I want to be me. I want to be real. I feel my best when I feel like I have the opportunity to share my heart with others. But I know that’s been lacking in what has been seen on DWTS. It’s true there is a disconnect. I am busting my ass. I am giving this my all. It’s my focus and passion right now. But each week I fall flat. I’ve gotten to the point of being so anxious before I perform that I can’t completely enjoy it like I wish and know I could. I KNOW I have a lot more I can give. I want to be able to feel free and confident to dance with my whole heart. I’m working on getting there. I’m not throwing a pity party. I can take criticism and understand hard work...and I also know that my attitude has to change to rise above this slump I’m in. But this is real life. These are real emotions. It’s okay to be grateful and positive, while also acknowledging the hard days we all have. It’s so important to think positively, but it’s also important to acknowledge and feel all the feels. This pressure to pretend is not good for anyone. That’s how this crazy cycle of perfectionism continues to exist in a lot of us. I’m blown away by the support I see and feel from all of you who love me through it all. So thank you— here’s to another opportunity to grow. See y’all next Monday!
Someone in particular posted a few words of encouragement after she got raw with fans. Tyler Cameron, the guy she eliminated during her season to pick Jed Wyatt as her man, which didn't last long, left some uplifting encouragement in the comment section.
"Fall down 7 times, get up 8! You got this HB. Be where your feet are and enjoy the ride. You're doing amazing," the contractor wrote.
During rehearsals, she admitted to her dance partner Alan Bersten that she's been struggling not just with the competition itself, but the fact that Los Angeles doesn't really feel like home. The 25-year-old opened up about being thrust into the spotlight and how her life has changed drastically since. On top of that, she says she's missing home and the simplicity of the south.
While she may have showed her emotion during practice, she was also caught getting emotional offstage after her performance.
"Hannah was crying a lot last night offstage," a source told Us Weekly before adding that they think she's upset about "more than just the show" they're just not sure what.
On top of already feeling down, she's been receiving some criticism from judge Carrie Ann Inaba the past few weeks. Most recently, Inaba mentioned a disconnect between Brown and her movements.
"You are disconnected from the movements. I need you to give your heart," the 51-year-old explained. "We want to see layers that nobody has seen before and I know it's hard to do but, I swear, if you open up and let it go raw out here, we will be here for you."
Despite Brown's struggle, she's still been a high-scorer on the hit show and has looked fabulous since starting.