Music

Kelly Clarkson Drops Huge Suicide Admission

Kelly Clarkson wanted to harm herself early in her career because of the pressure to stay ‘really […]

Kelly Clarkson wanted to harm herself early in her career because of the pressure to stay “really skinny.”

Clarkson told Attitude Magazine she was under pressure from music executives to be skinny. She was not happy and contemplated suicide.

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“When I was really skinny, I wanted to kill myself,” the singer said. “I was miserable, like inside and out, for four years of my life. But no one cared, because aesthetically you make sense.”

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Clarkson said she also considered quitting the music business. “I, like, wrecked my knees and my feet because all I would do is put in headphones and run,” the 35-year-old said. “I was at the gym all the time.”

Around the time of My December, which was released in 2007, Clarkson took control of her career and started kicking out the “negative people” in her life.

“I was around some really negative people, and I got out of it because I had a lot of great people there too,” she said. “It was a case of turning around, facing them and walking toward the light.”

Clarkson has been open about her struggle with weight in the past.

“I was the biggest girl [on American Idol] too,” she told Entertainment Tonight in April 2015. “And I wasn’t big, but people would call me big. Because I was the biggest one on Idol, I’ve kind of always gotten that.”

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Clarkson’s eighth album, Meaning of Life, comes out on Friday. She’s happily married to her husband, Brandon Blackstock, and they have a daughter and son. She will be a judge on the next season of The Voice.