Carrie Underwood is currently expecting her second child, but the singer recently revealed in an interview with CBS that she had suffered three miscarriage prior to her current pregnancy. During that time, she was working on her latest album, Cry Pretty, and shared in a new interview with Vulture just how much her personal struggles affected her new songs, many of which she co-wrote.
"It wasn’t a conscious thing," Underwood said. "It wasn’t like, 'I’m gonna write about this, because this just happened.' It would be completely inevitable. I’d have a terrible day at the doctor’s office and then come into a writing session and be like, 'I’m sorry guys. I might suck today. I just got some bad news.'"
The American Idol winner added that the people she was working with made her feel that she was able to get personal in the writing room.
"I was lucky enough to be around people that I felt really comfortable with," Underwood said. "I thought, 'What am I gonna do? Go home and wallow in this all day long? No, I want to keep working. I want to keep pushing forward. This is still something that has to be done.' And I kinda needed that at the time, just to have something to stay focused on that wasn’t my personal life."
The 35-year-old has billed Cry Pretty as her most personal album to date, and upon listening, that statement certainly holds true. While its songs may not directly reference Underwood's miscarriages, several do address loss, including the aching "Low," which finds Underwood feeling just as the title indicates.
"Things aren’t literal, but I look at a song like 'Low,' and that was my year last year," the Oklahoma native reflected. "It was not about a person leaving or anything like that. I listen to that song now, and there’s a good chance I’ll cry, because it was just so personal."
In her CBS interview, Underwood expressed similar sentiments, sharing that she used her writing sessions as a way to let out the emotions she was feeling.
"Throughout the whole process, you know, I'm writing and, like, literally right after finding out that I would lose a baby, I'd have a writing session, I'd be like, 'Let's go. You know, I can't just sit around thinking about this. Like, I wanna work, I wanna do this,'" she recalled.0comments
"'Cause I would literally have these horrible things going on in my life, and then have to go smile and, like, do some interviews or, like, do a photo shoot or something, you know?" she continued. "So it was just kind of, like, therapeutic, I guess."
Photo Credit: Getty / Kevin Winter