Holly Madison has gained a new understanding of herself after being diagnosed with autism earlier this year. The Girls Next Door alum, 43, revealed her diagnosis in a recent episode of the Talking to Death podcast, revealing that she had been “suspicious” that she was on the autism spectrum after noting the struggles she’s faced in social situations throughout her life.
“I had been suspicious of it for a while. I always kind of had trouble socially, not recognizing social cues, not picking up on things the same way other people did. But I just made excuses for it,” Madison shared during the podcast. “I thought it was because I grew up in Alaska. And then around middle school, we moved to Oregon and I thought, ‘Well, that was just a big social change.’ So I’m just very introverted. That’s always how I wrote it off.”
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Being diagnosed as autistic has been a relief for Madison, who noted how difficult social situations have been for her throughout life, as she struggles to make eye contact with people and is often found lost in her thoughts, both of which she’s found has been misunderstood in the past.
“I like being able to explain that,” the former Playboy model said. “I’ve only recently learned to make eye contact. I’m often in my own thoughts, things like that. So people take that as it’s some sort of like, ‘Oh, damn, you’re not super interested in me. Fโ you.’ I’m just not on the same social wavelength. But don’t take it personally.”
Madison, who dated Hugh Hefner from 2001 to 2008, said she’s experienced a sense of peace now that she can apologize for any perceived social faux pas, encouraging people to try to understand one another before casting judgment.
“Everybody operates differently. Interacting with anybody, just have a little bit of patience because you don’t know what they’re dealing with or what their level of social function is,” she explained. “I think even me, just the way I react with people, I have a little bit more patience now and I don’t take things as personally.”
Even as she expressed her own experience with autism, Madison made sure to impress upon the audience that she doesn’t speak for all autistic people, as everyone has a different reality. “I’m not a spokesperson for everybody,” she insisted. “They call it a spectrum for a reason.”
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NEW YORK CITY – DECEMBER 19: "Toil and Trouble" – Elsbeth is thrown into the world of television after the showrunner of a long-running police procedural is brutally murdered in his office, and although it appears to be the act of a disgruntled fan, she begins to suspect the show's longtime star Regina Coburn (Laurie Metcalf) who yearns for artistic fulfillment. Meanwhile, Judge Crawford (Michael Emerson) continues to be a thorn in Elsbeth's side, on the CBS original series ELSBETH, Thursday, Dec. 19 (10:00-11:00 PM, ET/PT) on the CBS Television Network, and streaming on Paramount+ (live and on demand for Paramount+ with SHOWTIME subscribers, or on demand for Paramount+ Essential subscribers the day after the episode airs). Pictured (L-R): Carrie Preston as Elsbeth Tascioni and Carra Patterson as Kaya Blanke. (Photo by Michael Parmelee/CBS via Getty Images)







