The Weeknd Opens up About His Drug Use When Writing Music

The Weeknd is going back to a dark time when he was a heavy drug user.

According to The Guardian, the Starboy singer says he would often use drugs when he was working on new music.

“When I had nothing to do but make music, it was very heavy,” he told the Guardian. “Drugs were a crutch for me. There were songs on my first record [House of Balloons] that were seven minutes long, rambling — whatever thoughts I was having when I was under the influence at the time.”

Before you freak out, The Weeknd (otherwise known as Abel) says he can’t see himself doing drugs anymore.

“I’ll be completely honest with you. The past couple of albums, I do get back to that,” he said. “Even on this new album [Starboy]. You have writer’s block. And sometimes you’re like, ‘I can’t do this sober.’”

He recently canceled on Rihanna’s tour to write Starboy which was released in late November. “I guess it was the weight on my shoulders. I’d canceled a tour — a lot of money. I had these ideas, but I couldn’t put them on wax.” He said he turned to drugs once again to help himself get going again. He said “once the ball started rolling. I didn’t need it anymore. I feel in control.”

The Weeknd recently ended his longtime relationship with Bella Hadid. The two recently crossed paths again at the 2016 Victoria’s Secret Fashion show and even shared the runway together. Hadid says she will always support Abel in whatever he does.