It's no secret that good sex requires a good pre-game. You wouldn't run a marathon without training, right? Or take the bar exam without studying? Like most great things, good sex takes time and prep work. While foreplay may sound intimidating or unnecessary, the best part about it is that you're making sex better for yourself in the long run — all while having a pretty good time, we might add.
Foreplay is especially important if you and your partner can predict each other's every move when it comes to the bedroom. You already know each other's favorite tricks, zones and buttons to push — and if it ain't broke, don't fix it, right? Maybe not. It doesn't hurt to experiment with a new foreplay method or surprise your partner with something fun and new.
Ready to take sex to the next level? Prolong the pre-game with these new foreplay tips.
Who said you need your partner to put you in the mood? Before getting down to business, do something that makes you feel sexy. Whether it's killing a kickboxing session (hello, endorphins), donning your sexiest lingerie, listening to a power anthem or sensual tune, or rubbing on your favorite body lotion, get in the right headspace for sex. That way, you'll be more willing to make it last, rather than get in a ten-minute quickie.
You don't have to wait for the bedroom door to close before getting busy. Send your partner a racy text (or better yet, photo) in the middle of the work day to get both your hearts racing. The anticipation will grow all day, practically guaranteeing a sex session that will leave you seeing stars. Or if you're with your guy in public, let your hand graze a little too close to his crotch at the dinner table. Even if you're just Netflix and chilling, get a little handsy before heading to bed to get both of you in the mood.
Next time you find yourself in the oh-so-comfy spoon position, take it to the next level by exploring his thighs with your hands. Graze your fingertips along his inner thigh, stopping right before the scrotum, then quickly move back down. Have him stimulate your breasts from behind, rubbing the areolae in the 10 o'clock and 2 o'clock positions. The anticipation will kill both of you, and you'll be lucky if you even make it into the bedroom.
If your partner is missing a body part you've been wanting to explore during sex, why not lead by example? For example, use your tongue, teeth and warm breath to stimulate his nipples, or kiss his neck while grazing your fingers along his collarbone, into the spot where the neck and collarbone meet. If his hair is long enough, straddle him and give his locks a gentle tug to show you're ready to play. Odds are he'll mimic your sexy moves, leaving you to reap the rewards.
Tell your guy you want to give him a massage to kick things off. Grab the baby oil, light some candles and let a couple Al Green songs work their magic. Work your way to his lower back — the sacrum, to be precise (the bony plate at the base of the spine, above the butt crack). It's ripe with nerves and likely to take his arousal to the next level. Use a light touch, then brush your cheek against it, then dangle the ends of your hair along his skin. If you see goosebumps, you know you're on the right track. Then go in for a sexy surprise — straddle him and align your clitoris along his sacrum. Move your hips back and forth to use his spine to arouse you while still massaging his back. Just see how long he can last before flipping over.
Before getting to the deed, have your guy reach down and stimulate your clitoris. Guide your hand on top of his, showing him the spots you like to have touched. The shared masturbation experience (can it technically be called masturbation if you have help?) will turn both of you on, and it'll be an educational experience too. Chances are things probably aren't as complicated with his penis, but ask if he wants to do the same thing.
To ramp up intensity before sex, play the adult version of the red light, green light game. Take turns touching each other all over your bodies. Indicate how to proceed: red means stop, yellow means slow, green means fast. From oral sex to using your hands, explore any and every body part you want before finishing with the obvious. It definitely takes some time, but both of you will be beyond ready when you finally give that green light.
Sure, by now we've all come to the collective conclusion that shower sex is clunky, awkward and rarely works (water is NOT a sexual lubricant, people!). In fact, unless you have a shower with specifically-built slip-resistant benches and ledges for dealing with the weird height difference, shower sex is damn near impossible (unless you're Tamera Mowry!) Shower foreplay, on the other hand, might be just the trick. Lather each other up, rub each other down, and revert to the old days with a classic hand job. Use some soap to assist you and let muscle memory take over from there. Work your way up from the bottom of his shaft to the head of his penis. After a super quick towel dry, hit the sheets.
The ilioinguinal nerve, located at the top of the inner thigh, is incredibly sensitive to the touch. First, gently caress your fingers in a trail from his mid thigh to the upper inner thigh. Then, lick your finger and create a wet trail up his thigh. Next, trace that trail with your tongue and watch his reaction. If he flinches, it means you're tickling him — use firmer kisses and licks. When your partner practices the same move on you, you'll feel a must-have-you-now pulse through your pelvis. Hold out as long as you can, then get down to business.