One of the hardest parts about being a mother is all the mom-shaming that comes at you, and mothers-in-law tend to be the most notorious offenders.
It’s bad enough when peer-moms criticize you for feeding your baby something they don’t approve of, or letting your kids watch some show they deem offensive, but when your mother-in-law, a woman who you think would be supportive and encouraging shames your parenting, it hurts much more.
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The outright rude critiques are rough, but it’s the passive-aggressive, snarky jabs that really get to you because you feel less like you have control over the situation and therefore very little room to defend yourself.
Over at Cafe Mom, they compiled a list of some of the most melancholy mom-shaming that women had to suffer from their mothers-in-law (or MIL, for short) and we’ve adapted those stories for you below. Scroll down to read them all.
Potty Training Shamer
“According to my wicked witch of a MIL, my son is never going to get fully potty trained because I’m not strict enough with him. Lady, he’s only 2.5, give me a break.” — G.R.
PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE, BUT MEANS WELL
“I think my mother-in-law means well, but she is so passive-aggressive. Her latest thing is making all these little digs about why I haven’t taught my son to ride his bike yet (she rides her bike everywhere). Um, maybe because he’s only in preschool and doesn’t want to learn?” — D.J.
Plastic Nipple Disapproval
“I’m breastfeeding but I work so I also pump so my son takes a bottle too. My MIL does this thing where she wrinkles her nose and asks if I ‘really feel okay about a plastic nipple in his mouth? Such a gross way to phrase that, right?” — P.K.
VINDICATION
“My MIL always claims that my kids are only picky eaters for me because I’m too soft-hearted with them. Then she had them for a weekend and they refused to eat everything she cooked so she had to breakdown and order pizza. Vindicated!” — A.E.
Baby Booties
“You know how there are always those old ladies who insist that every baby looks cold and needs socks, no matter what the temperature is? Yep. That’s my MIL. She’s convinced my babies are gonna freeze to death. I LIVE IN ARIZONA. They’re fine.” — S.T.
HELICOPTER PARENT
“My MIL totally tries to shame me for all the things I do around safety that she thinks are ‘helicopter parenting.’ A good example is that she thinks insisting on helmets for bike and scootering is me ‘raising wimps’ so she rolls her eyes when I make the kids wear them.” — C.R.
Seen and Not Heard
“She is so old-school and I don’t really think she actually enjoys kids. She thinks I’m strange for wanting to play with my kids. She thinks they should be seen and not heard, I guess.” — J.H.
UNSOLICITED HAIRCUT
“SHE CUT HIS HAIR! My MIL thought we were being ridiculous for letting my son keep his hair long, so she took it upon herself to get him a haircut with out asking us first. That moved from shaming to straight-up interfering. I’m still so mad.” — I.B.
The Food Shamer
“The food shaming kills me. My MIL feels like her job is to constantly offer ‘advice’ about how to feed the kids, and I’m over it. I’ve got this and I don’t think they’re suffering because I actually make them eat vegetables.” — S.R.
SPOILED ROTTEN
“According to my husband’s stepmom, I’m spoiling the baby by picking her up when she cries. She’s 3 months old. I’m not spoiling her, I’m taking care of her! It’s impossible to spoil a baby.” — T.D.
TABLET DICTATOR
“My kids each have a tablet and get to use them on the weekend. My MIL thinks this is ruining their brains so when she comes over she tries to hide the tablets or turns them off and tells the kids they broke. It makes me so mad.” — F.R.
DADDY DAY CARE?
“What drives me crazy is that she has no expectations for my husband when it comes to childcare. She acts like he is doing ME a favor by taking care of the kids. She says a lot of things like ‘Isn’t it lucky he changes diapers?’ No, he’s also a parent!” — E.C.
STAY AT HOME MOM SHAMING
“My MIL is really career driven — which is great! I’m glad she loves her job. But I’m happy to be a SAHM right now and I don’t appreciate that she acts like I’m lazy for not working.
“I cringe when she starts any sentence with ‘It must be nice…’ and then talks about how much ‘free time’ I have.” — B.T.
SLEEP SCHEDULE SHAMER
“She shamed me during pregnancy, she shamed me about breastfeeding, and now she shames me about trying to have the baby on sleep schedule.
“She’s ridiculous.” — H.C.
HEATHENS RAISING HEATHENS
“We’re not a churchgoing family. My MIL is super religious.
“She constantly shames me for not having the kids getting baptized. I think she’s convinced we’re all going to hell.” — H.K.
