‘Biggest Loser’ Winner Shares Heartbreaking Details About Regaining Weight After Sexual Assualt

In 2008, Ali Vincent became the first female winner of the Biggest Loser when she shed 112 pounds. After regaining the weight, she is facing an emotional struggle as well as a health struggle.

During an interview on Oprah: Where Are They Now? she revealed that she had been sexually assaulted and the trauma triggered her recent weight gain, E! News reports. She once again weighs over 200 pounds and has joined Weight Watchers. The weight gain made her question herself.

“The Biggest Loser gave me the opportunity to believe in myself and I don’t know that I ever really did,” she said on an episode of T.D. Jakes Monday. “Everybody wanted me to and I wanted to for them, and I had results to prove it. But do I really deserve to have everything that I dream of? Do I deserve to have this happiness?”

She admitted her insecurities and past traumas sometimes seem insurmountable.

>> Read more: Meet the Woman Who Credits Her Transformation to One Simple Change

“I know there’s stuff to deal with and I know that it goes back way far, but then I also feel like—I’m 41 years old. When am I going to just own my own stuff?” she posited. “How can I just let go?”

Jakes responded, “It has nothing to do with age. You can be 91. Until you confront whatever it is that’s eating at you, it will live forever.”

He added, “You cannot allow what happened to you to control what is possible for you.”

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This story first appeared on Womanista.