Maci Bookout is looking back on the progress she’s made on her Teen Mom: Family Reunion retreat as she looks to make some big changes upon her return home to husband Taylor McKinney and her three kids. The Teen Mom OG star gets honest about her “unhealthy relationship” with emotion during a sitdown with Coach Bryant in a PopCulture.com exclusive sneak peek of Tuesday’s all-new Family Reunion episode.
“I feel like I’ve made a lot of progress while I’ve been here and done a lot of work on myself while I’ve been here,” Bookout tells Coach B, revealing she’s afraid of going backward with her progress when she gets back to her normal life. “I can definitely say before this [retreat], I knew I had an unhealthy relationship with feelings. My main thing coming in was just finding out who Maci is, and I’ve done a lot of work on that. I’m not as uptight as I had allowed myself to be.”
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She continues, “Being here, I’ve really wanted to get to know who Maci is as a 30-year-old woman, not who’s Maci as a mom. And leaving here, I just feel like this clarity.” When Coach B pushes the reality personality about something deeper that might be going on, Bookout reveals how her past has affected her relationship with McKinney over the years.
“Taylor and I really do have a very good relationship โ we like each other a lot, we’re really good friends โ but I could tell for sure that especially in the last couple of years that closed off-ness inside of me was really preventing us from again getting to know the older, more mature, more grownup Maci,” she explains, “because I was still bringing the kid to the fight and to the marriage and everything. But I’m not 17 anymore.”
Coach B reminds Bookout that marriage and parenting are “grown folk business,” so when she allows her younger self to enter those realms of her life, “it’s a wrap.” She adds of younger Maci, “She was a powerhouse for surviving, but through being a powerhouse and surviving came a lot of trauma. And so when she arrives to the fight, she’s tearing stuff up.”
Bookout wants to stay accountable for her family when she gets home so as not to fall. back into old patterns, and Coach B reminds her that if she simply begins to shift the family dynamic in a positive way, other things will begin to shift around her. “It’s just your responsibility then to continue to use the tools and do the work,” she says.ย Teen Mom: Family Reunion airs Tuesdays at 8 p.m. ET on MTV.