Tim McGraw Recalls Ultimatum Faith Hill Gave Him That Changed His Entire Life

As Tim McGraw‘s career was hitting a new peak more than a decade ago, with albums, hit singles and movie roles, his personal life was hitting an all-time low. Mourning the death of his father, Tug McGraw, and dealing with his own internal battles drove him to overeating, excessive drinking and an overall unhealthy lifestyle – a path he may have continued on if not for an ultimatum his wife, Faith Hill, gave him.

“My emotional absence was noticed and it was not scoring any points,” McGraw wrote in his new book, Grit & Grace (via PEOPLE). “[Faith] has always offered unconditional love in every situation and never for a second have I doubted her willingness to support whatever step I needed to take to find my way back to health. Yet in that instance, she knew that someone had to lay down the law. Getting real like only she can do, Faith told me, ‘Partying or family, take your pick.’”

By the time Hill presented McGraw with his two choices, his life had already been spiraling out of control for quite some time, with much of it driven by his own insecurities.

“I wasn’t comfortable sitting back, watching and waiting in stillness,” McGraw acknowledged. “In hindsight, I think it’s because if things got quiet, I’d hear the old ghosts that tend to follow at my heels like shadows. The ones that say, You’re just a small-town country singer on a lucky streak — what do you know about success? Working hard and playing hard kept things noisy enough inside to drown them out.”

“But when you’re a partner and a parent, if you don’t leave intensity at the door when you come home, it starts to strain the bonds,” he continued. “You don’t even realize you’re using worldly stresses and pressures as a way to check out of something harder to navigate — like intimacy and being there emotionally for the people who love you most.”

The Louisiana native doesn’t know where he would be if Hill hadn’t put her foot down, but it likely would be in an unhealthy place.

“When things happen and you succeed beyond your wildest dreams and you’re playing all these great shows and the parties are going on,” McGraw admitted on the Today Show. “Then you’re married and you have kids. And all of a sudden your wife looks at you and says, ‘You know, you’re getting a little overboard and you need to make some decisions.’ It makes a big impact on you.”

Order Grit & Grace on McGraw’s website.

Photo Credit: Getty / Matt Winkelmeyer