Kim Kardashian Breaks Down Crying Over Kanye West

Kim Kardashian is opening up about the toll ex-husband Kanye West’s erratic behavior takes on her. In The Kardashians Season 3 premiere Thursday, Kardashian revealed in an emotional conversation with mom Kris Jenner that having the father of her four kids lash out on social media at her and her loved ones is having a serious impact on her mental health.

Kardashian opened up to her mom about suffering from an “anxiety attack,” sharing that she felt like she “couldn’t breathe all day.” Going into some of West’s behavior online, Kardashian told Jenner, “I never comment. I never post. He has made up the most insane narrative about you, the [sex tape with Ray J], and we stay silent, we stay silent through all the lies, all the stuff.”

Kardashian noted that she now assumes anything she texts her ex will be put on the internet, but that it’s most hurtful for her to see how West is attacking her family and friends. “I just get really heartbroken for my mom that she has to deal with so much from so many different sides of people coming at her,” the SKIMS founder said.

When it comes to their kids – North, 9, Saint, 7, Chicago, 5, and Psalm, 3 – Kardashian pointed out, “All of his shenanigans – I don’t even know what the f- to call it – is gonna be far more damaging to the kids one day than my tape will ever be. And I have to sit here and not say anything ever because I know one day my kids will appreciate that. And I know that is the best thing for them.”

Even during her darkest days with West, Kardashian still keeps a positive attitude about him in front of their kids. “I’m the one where s- could be going down and I get in the car and every day the kids want to blast Dad’s music, and I’m like, ‘He’s the best! Yeah!’ And I put it on, and we’re singing along and inside I’m dying,” she said. “I will be his biggest cheerleader to them forever. One day when they see for themselves, I’ll answer whatever they want me to, but it’s just a lot.” Breaking down in tears, Kardashian claimed she can “never” have a bad day because she has to stay strong for everyone else. “I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to be a part of this narrative,” she cried. The Kardashians streams new episodes Thursdays on Hulu.