Aaron Hernandez Suicide Note to Daughter: ‘Daddy Will Never Leave You’

Aaron Hernandez‘s suicide notes have been published more than a year after his passing, including a heartbreaking missive to his daughter.

When Hernandez died in his prison cell, he left behind a notebook containing three letters, according to a report by the New York Post. One was addressed to his daughter, one to his fiance, and the third to his lawyer, Jose Baez. Now, Baez is gearing up for the release of his tell-all book, Unnecessary Roughness: Inside the Trial and Final Days of Aaron Hernandez, which comes out on Tuesday, Aug. 21. In preparation, Baez allowed the Post to publish all three of Hernandez’s notes.

“Avi,” Hernandez addressed his daughter, Avielle Jenkins-Hernandez. The girl was only 4 years old at the time of Hernandez’s death.

“Daddy will never leave you!” the embattled football player wrote. “I’m entering to the timeless realm in which I can enter into any form at any time because everything that could happen or not happened I see all at once! Life is eternal — believe!!!”

In just seven sentences, Hernandez advised his daughter on how to live a good and fulfilling life.

“Love, repent, and see me/yourself in everyone because that’s what the truth is!” he wrote. “I’ll see you all in the heavens awaiting you all with the same love. Never fear me, but love me with all of you! Fear is the only separation between you and I! We are each other—I/you—you/me—there’s no need to fear but what you do unto another will come back around!”

Beneath that, Hernandez listed several books, which Baez speculated were the most meaningful texts to Hernandez during his incarceration. They are Power of Now, Conversations with God 1, 2, and 3, Home with God and Metu Neter volume 2: Anuk Ausar.

Hernandez’s letter to Jenkins is equally metaphysical. In it, he addresses her as “Shay,” which Baez notes he rarely did in real life.

“You have always been my soul-mate and I want you to love life and know I’m always with you,” he wrote. “I told you what was coming indirectly! I love you so much and know [you] are an angel. We split into two to come change the world! Your characteristic is that of a true angel and the definition of God’s love!”

Hernandez asked Jenkins to look after their daughter, as well as his young cousins, Jano and Eddie. He also wrote out the title “I Knew I Loved You,” which Baez said was his and Shay’s “song” together. At the bottom of the page, in increasingly large letter, he included more cryptic notes.

“NOT MUCH TIME.”

“I’M BEING CALLED!”

“JOHN 3:16.”

“IT’S TIME!”

“The Real Live Forever.”

By contrast, Hernandez’s letter to Baez is much more casual. It was dated the day before the former NFL player’s passing, and Baez feels that it shows a level of optimism that the other letters do not. However, there is an unmistakable trace of forboding in these words as well.

“Well, I wrote this letter following my acquittal and wanted to voice how I felt and let some people whos[e] music helped me get through hard times, know that it did,” he wrote. “Wrong or right — who knows — I just follow my natural instincts and how it guides me. Pros or cons, didn’t weigh them, but I’m sure you’ll let me know your view.”

Hernandez thanked Baez and his team for all of the hard work they had put into his case. “I want you to know you have me forever like you never understood and time will reveal that I’m not perfect but my love and loyalty is like you’ve never seen!” he wrote.

“In time, you will see how appreciated you are, as well as all the others equally!”

Hernandez then asked Baez to connect him with five rappers — Kevin Gates, Rick Ross, Jay-Z and The Game — whom he wanted to thank for getting him through his hard times.

“Well, get at me, love ya brother!” he finished.

Baez’s book is set to hit shelves on Tuesday, Aug. 21.