This Is What Your Man Is Too Scared to Ask for in the Bedroom

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It doesn't matter how much great sex you and your partner are having — there's always that annoying thought in the back of your mind pestering you. Is there anything he's holding back? From a new position to a sexual fantasy, you'll always wonder if he's not saying something that he wishes he could.

Fear not, because here we have nine things men secretly wish they could ask you for in the bedroom. Whether or not your partner thinks along the same lines as these men is up to you to decipher.

Group sex

"Group sex is something I think would be a crazy experience, but there's never been a partner who I would ask for that. It would take a lot of alcohol to admit." —Daniel, 24


"I wish I could just ask for a blowjob sometimes without feeling like I'm asking to be serviced." —Andrei, 26

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"Threesomes. I wouldn't want to hurt her feelings and have her interpret it like, 'Oh, you don't like me? You need more?'" —Grant, 25

Take it outside the bedroom

"I want my girl to spice it up a little. I want to come home from work and have her greet me naked on the kitchen table. I want the fun taken outside the bedroom sometimes." —Juan, 21

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"Dominate me! Having to ask kind of defeats the purpose." —Dean, 27

Tie you up

"I've always wanted to tie a girl up, but I'm worried about asking for that. I watch Law & Order. I know how wrong that can go." —Bill, 21

Initiate more often

"Men are expected to perform all the time and that's not realistic," says Dr. Dawn Michael, clinical sexologist and author of Intimacy Guidebook for Couples. "They don't always want to be the one to initiate sex."

(Photo: Shutterstock)

Keep the lights on

"Keep the lights on every time." Lou, 36

Play out a fantasy

"Especially among younger men, porn gives this false sense that that's what sex can or should look like," says Ken Solin, dating expert and author of the forthcoming book Boomer Guide to Finding Love Online. "Talk about sex and what it is that you want, what you need, and what you're willing to give," Solin says. "If you have a deep emotional bond, there's not a lot that isn't sexually viable."

Use your hands

"I'm sure it's mostly through impulse when my gf does it but she grabs my arms to feel my triceps flexing when I'm on top. Sometimes she'll grab my neck and pull my hair if it's long enough. Ass-grabbing if you can reach. When I get closer to her she'll wrap her arms around my back and clench. Makes me feel good and helps me think that I'm doing something right." —Reddit user theedang

Wear his favorite jersey


"Dress up in my favorite team's jersey and nothing else. It shows me you know me well—plus, it's incredibly hot." Chris, 32


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