Leah Messer has had some struggles with depression and even suicidal thoughts, which she has recently opened up about outside of Teen Mom 2.
The reality star is best known for her role in the long-running MTV show, where she has grown up from the time she was a young girl. However, not all of her journey has been clearly laid out on TV, and on this week’s inaugural episode of her new Life Reboot Podcast, Messer opened up about her mental health.
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Messer was joined by her manager, Lindsey Rielly and Brian Scott, for a candid conversation that covered a wide range of topics. She confessed that she had been “suicidal” in the past, and had often found it impossible to “love myself.”
“I had this expectation of who I was supposed to be as a mom, as a wife, as a person and Iโฆ just never reached them,” she said.
Messer told the familiar story of struggling to escape depression, find emotional stability and shake it off. However, time and time again she found that it was harder than she expected. She finally accepted that getting better would be hard work, and set herself to the task.
Messer said that her secret to conquering those demons was the power of words. She would stick motivational words to her mirror so that she saw them every day, and reminded herself that “this life is worth living.”
“It’s like I had to train my mind to know that I am love, I am confident, I am worthy and until I said that repeatedly to myself and like, it just did wonders,” she explained.
Hoping to instill good habits and self-esteem from a young age, Messer even got her young daughters in on the practice of self-love. She said that Adalynn, Aleeah and Aliannah took to the idea more easily and helped her with her own recovery.
“Even for my girls, when they started school this year, they knewโฆ Addie wrote on the chalk board, she was likeโฆ ‘I am happy because I have a family that loves me and she even put like why and blessed,” she recalled.
Messer said that she was glad to have found this method of coping before her Ali was diagnosed with muscular dystrophy. For her, a regimen of positivity helped keep her from spiraling back into depression.
“I cried, oh my gosh, it was unbearable,” she remembered. “But in that moment I realized that she is an incredible little girl that’s going to do incredible things in this life no matter what she has, no matter what she goes through.”