Kristen Bell and Dax Shepard’s Most Hilariously Honest Anecdotes

After first meeting in 2007 and almost 10 years together as a married couple, Kristen Bell and Dax Shepard have racked up some pretty amazing stories by each other’s sides. Bell, 41, and Shepard, 46, aren’t afraid to open up about love, parenting and other adventures they’ve taken together, resulting in some brutally honest anecdotes.

Continue on to read some of Kristen Bell and Dax Shepard’s most candid stories together — whether funny, disturbing or simply honest.

When the kids walked in on them

While appearing on Jimmy Kimmel Live! in November, Shepard cleared up a story that Bell had previously told about their daughters, Lincoln, 5, and Delta, 4, walking on them during sex.

“OK, they didn’t walk in while I was, like, pounding Mom,” Shepard explained to the laughing studio audience. “We put on the TV in the living room — we’re bad parents — and then we stole away for a minute, afternoon delight, but we were just under the sheets and they walked in. It was more just explaining why we’re taking, like, a nap in the afternoon while they were loose.”

He further explained that it wasn’t “full coitus interruptus” but said that “Suffice it to say, I wouldn’t have gotten out of bed at that moment. That would’ve been a strange nap I was taking.”

Previously, Bell had told the story on The Talk. “We didn’t, like, continue,” she said. “We sort of just went like, ‘Hey, what’s up? What do you need? What do you need?’ … And then we just said, ‘Mommy and Daddy are just going to take a nap for a couple more minutes.’”

When they almost split after a dumb fight

Once upon a time, the couple overcame an argument so ferocious that it almost caused them to split up. Bell told the story to Jimmy Kimmel about how early on in their relationship, they road-tripped on a motorcycle from New York City to Detroit to visit their parents and ended up furious at each other for hours due to the music choice. They had previously agreed to switch the music after every couple of states, but Bell made a surprise switch while Shepard was inside a gas station.

“Well he was not happy because I didn’t ask, we didn’t discuss it and we’re both control freaks. That fight got bigger and bigger as we’re on the road which morphed into a fight about helmet laws because Dax Shepard believes that if he’s in a state that does not have a helmet law, he should be observing the local culture and not wear his helmet,” she said.

“And I was like, ‘Excuse me, no you have to wear a helmet,’” she continued. “So this morphs into an even bigger fight and we end up compromising to where if he was on the highway he had to wear the helmet and if he was on side streets he didn’t have to wear the helmet.”

That certain agreement led to her future husband taking side streets instead of the highway for roughly four hours — a development that surely could not have gone over well — and then it began to rain.

“You have to wear [the helmet] if it’s raining, period,” Bell told him. “He was not happy. I think from all of Ohio to up through Michigan we were fighting so bad we both lost our voices because we were both screaming at each other on the motorcycle. I refused to hold onto him, so I held onto the back of the motorcycle like a boss.”

“I was like, ‘I’m not touching you right now,’ ” she added.

When they finally reached Detroit, Bell’s mom greeted them with VHS tapes of Alf, “Because that was our favorite show,” Bell said.

“Dax describes that moment as ‘I had an out-of-body experience. Because I hate this girl I’m sitting next to, we’re about to break up, I think her mom is crazy and all of a sudden I watching Alf.’” Bell explained. “He was fully outside his own body and we got through two or three (episodes) before he politely excused himself to visit his dad.”

“But we continued dating, Jimmy,” she added. “And that’s the moral of the story.”

The time Bell ‘nursed’ Shepard with her breast

Parenting brings many couples together in ways previously unimaginable — like the time Bell had Shepard nurse from her breast for a legitimate health reason. In an episode of her web series Momsplaining, Bell shared that Shepard had to “nurse” her when she was at risk for mastitis, a painful infection of breast tissue that can be caused by a blocedk milk duct.

Bell explained that it happened when one of her daughters had stopped breastfeeding. “I was in Atlanta. We couldn’t call a doctor, and this was right after the baby stopped nursing. So I said to my husband, ‘I really need you to suck this out. We could talk about it, we could be weird about it, or you could just go ahead and nurse.”

So he obliged.

“He pulled it out. He had a cup next to him. He was pulling out and spitting into this cup, and I’ve never been more in love in my life,” she said.

When Shepard said he’s totally cool with the fact that Bell makes more money than him

Shepard told Conan O’Brien during an appearance on his late-night show that he’s happy for his wife’s success in Hollywood — mostly because it’s worked out well for him, since they never signed a prenuptial agreement.

“When we first started dating, I had more money than her and I owned the house that I lived in,” Shepard told O’Brien. “And she said to me at one point, ‘Would you like a prenup?’ I said, ‘No, I don’t want a prenup,’ but I really wanted a prenup, really bad.”

“The joke is on her,” Shepard quipped, because she’s become much more successful than me and has much more money than me.” Bell has gone on to star in a string of megahit movies like Frozen and Bad Moms.

They’re open about going to couples therapy often

The two have been very open about the fact that they’ve attended couples therapy for years — even before they got married in 2013.

Shepard told Good Housekeeping that he and Bell fell for each other despite misgivings they both had about the other.

“There were hurdles, things she didn’t trust about me, things I didn’t trust about her,” he said. “I just kept going back to ‘This person has the thing I want, and I have to figure out how we can exist peacefully.’ So we started [seeing a therapist together] right away.”

“Therapy is not something to be embarrassed about,” Bell said, adding that they started therapy right away instead of waiting for things to go south and run the risk it would be too late to save their relationship. “In my previous relationship, we went to couples therapy at the end, and that’s often too late,” Shepard said.

Shepard said that they don’t believe in ‘the one’

Keeping up with the brutally honest theme of their relationship, Shepard told Us Weekly that “We don’t believe in ‘the one’. We don’t believe in the fairytale. We are opposites and it has taken a tremendous amount of work and therapy for us to coexist.”

He insists that while they love each other very much, their marriage is “labor intensive” and they’ve cleared many hurdles, like an early breakup and “toxic” behavior.

The time they fought over a La-Z-Boy chair

Shepard opened up to Ellen DeGeneres on her eponymous talk show in 2017 about the time he and Bell argued over a La-Z-Boy chair that was initially supposed to belong in his office, but didn’t end up fitting, so he brought it home to their media room.

“I’m winning the battle. I certainly won’t win the war,” he said, before touting the benefits of his new favorite chair, which sits in the very middle of the room in front of a giant projector screen.

“What’s funny is that if she’d just embrace the chair for a couple months, I’d be too weak to fight back,” he said, adding that the chair is so comfortable that his muscles atrophy after using it for a while.

DeGeneres asked Shepard where Bell sits, if the chair is placed in the middle of the room in front of their regular couch.

“It’s just bad feng shui. It’s right in the middle of the room in front of an L-shaped sofa,” DeGeneres argued.

“I’m function over feng shui,” Shepard joked back, eventually admitting that he knows he’s “in the minority” of those who think a La-Z-Boy chair in the middle of the living room is a good idea.

The time their daughter repeated the F word (multiple times)

In another story shared with DeGeneres, Shepard said that after accidentally saying “motherf—er” in front of his Lincoln and Delta, Lincoln picked up on the habit, much to his and Bell’s horror.

After explaining that he hit his nose on the bookshelf in their room while reading a goodnight story, he said, “I let a couple motherf—ers rip.”

“Wham! Straight into the bridge of my nose. Hardest I’ve ever been hit. I almost blacked out,” he said.

The worst part of the story is that Kristen’s walking down the hallway and LIncon’s in her room trying to get her sweatshirt off… and her arms are all bound up in it, she’s getting frustrated. And she goes, ‘Ow, f—!’”

The parents decided to pretend that it didn’t happen out of concern that if they told her not to say it, she’d of course repeat it over and over again.

“About five hours later, we’re about a pool party… She’s in the pool, she goes, ‘This pool’s f—ing warm,” Shepard said to the laughing crowd.

“You’re good parents, it seems,” DeGeneres joked.