Courtney Stodden Was Afraid She Would Die Before She Reached 27

Courtney Stodden was once afraid she would die before she turned 27, the former reality TV star said in a new interview this week.

“I became famous at a really young age and I think in order to handle that, I became this character, like a Halloween costume if you will, every day,” Stodden told TooFab. “I think with the divorce happening, I went through some major soul searching and realized that if I continue down that route I don’t think I’m going to make it to 27, to be deep and honest.”

Stodden said she felt she needed to change her name as she tries out a career as a singer and has decided upon Ember as her new professional name.

“I felt like I had to change my birth name, which is really weird,” Stodden explained. “But [I had] to shed that entire image and actually do what my passion is and what I’ve been doing my entire career since I was a little girl, which is singing.”

Stodden shot to fame in 2011, when the then-16-year-old married Lost actor Doug Hutchison, who was 51 at the time. The couple is now going through a divorce, following their split last year. Stodden officially filed for divorce on March 6 and is now dating Chris Sheng, 37.

“It’s a lot. There’s a lot of love in that relationship, a lot of toxic energy as well,” Stodden told TooFab of the divorce process. “When you’re still madly in love with someone, when it’s falling apart, it’s going to get toxic. We’re both trying our hardest to hold onto our sanity during this difficult time. I’m hoping that the pain will heal in a sense.”

Their relationship was shaken up after Stodden suffered a miscarriage in 2016.

Since the couple separated, Stodden has continued to share racy footage on social media and keeps fans up to date on her transition to the music business. Earlier this month, she released the single “Me Too,” in which she discusses her sexual assaults, and performed “Sixteen” for TooFab.

“I put my entirety into the song … that song is just scratching the surface to be honest,” she told TooFab about “Sixteen.” “Obviously, it was inspired by my controversial marriage and the age I was and the effect it had on me behind closed doors.”

In March, Stodden said she was sexually abused twice during her separation from Hutchison, but did not give further details.

In February, Stodden told The Daily Mail her new goal is to “get out of” the “bimbo” role people look at her as. “I went into that caricature of myself to protect myself. I felt I was playing it so people couldn’t really see who I was,” she said.

During their marriage, Stodden and Hutchison appeared on Couples Therapy in 2012. She was also a contestant on Celebrity Big Brother in the U.K. in 2013 and Celebs Go Dating in 2017. Her other credits include episodes of Million Dollar Matchmaker, Reality Ex-Wives, Hollywood Hillbillies and The Mother/Daughter Experiment: Celebrity Edition.

Stodden’s debut album will be released on July 8.

Photo credit: Paul Archuleta/FilmMagic/Getty