Until Thursday, WrestleMania 34’s main event was still up in the air. Then Donald Trump vs. Joe Biden happened.
After the former Vice President said he’d “beat the hell” out of Trump for the disrespectful things he’s said about women, Trump jabbed back and said if things did come to fisticuffs Biden would “go down fast and hard, crying all the way.”
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While America comes to grasps with this latest example of regression, wrestling icon, Terry Funk eloquently projected what Trump vs. Biden would actually look like.
The 73-year old said the following to Deadspin:
“If those guys went at it, it would be a very, very sh—y thing to watch. I’d love to get in the ring with those two a—holes. Both of them at once would be fine with me. They don’t even have to tag in. If either one of them’s looking for an ass kicking, tell them to call me up. I’m over 70!” said the hardcore legend.
If you’re missing the context, here’s the Biden quote that started it all. When discussing Trump infamous Access Hollywood video, Biden said the following to University of Miami students:
“They asked me would I like to debate this gentleman, and I said no. I said, ‘If we were in high school, I’d take him behind the gym and beat the hell out of him,” he said.
Never one to miss a Twitter opportunity, Trump hit back with this surreal tweet:
Crazy Joe Biden is trying to act like a tough guy. Actually, he is weak, both mentally and physically, and yet he threatens me, for the second time, with physical assault. He doesn’t know me, but he would go down fast and hard, crying all the way. Don’t threaten people Joe!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) March 22, 2018
We’re not sure where Terry Funk fits in all of this, but the more the merrier.
Funk has retired from professional wrestling many times in the past, only to make a return at a later date. His most notable retirement came in the fall of 1997 when a retirement show was put together in his hometown of Amarillo, Texas. At that show, Funk wrestled then WWF Champion Bret “Hitman” Hart in the main event. He was even presented a “lifetime ECW Champion” title belt before the match. The belt was paid for by donations from the ECW roster at the time and given to him by Paul Heyman. The event was also captured in the film Beyond The Mat.
Funk was in the ring again three months later and wrestled at WWE‘s WrestleMania XIV just six months after the Amarillo retirement show.
Prior to Friday night with Big Time Wrestling, the last time the Funker was in the ring was in October 2015 in a match with Jerry “The King” Lawler for USA Championship Wrestling in Tennessee. He again announced his retirement in September 2016 at a House of Hardcore show, only to be booked by Big Time Wrestling a couple of months ago.
Funk recently said that he wouldn’t mind wrestling Ric Flair one last time. Though that is an almost definite impossibility, we wouldn’t doubt that we’ll probably see Terry Funk in the ring again a time or two.
