TBS Not Canceling ‘A Christmas Story’ Marathon, Despite Rumors

You’ll still be able to shoot your eye out this Christmas, should you get the inclination.

After rumors ran rampant that TBS would no longer air its annual 24-hour marathon of A Christmas Story, the network took to social media to clear things up: A Christmas Story will still air all day and night on Christmas in the true holiday tradition.

The internet was up in arms when a headline began circulating saying that the classic holiday film would no longer air due to the “bully scenes” in the family-friendly flick.

“NO ONE and i mean NO ONE is gonna stop me from watching A Christmas Story. HE has been getting bullied for over 20 years in the movie..why change it now. Scot Fargus [the bully character] was an ass— and am sure all parents explained that to their kids,” one Twitter user wrote.

“I’m sick of y’all man..” another wrote.

“What type of soft s— is this generation on..?” one outraged person tweeted to thousands of retweets.

But the headline turned out to be fake; TBS declared at the end of November that the marathon would continue as planned.

“We are NOT cancelling our ‘A Christmas Story’ marathon!” TBS shared in a tweet, adding the hashtag #LegLampForever.

Fans rejoiced in the good news.

“Whew I was nervous,” one Twitter user wrote. “my favorite Christmas tradition.”

“Who started this vicious rumor? I almost fainted!” another wrote.

“Bruh don’t be playing like that,” someone else said.

In other timely news about the classic film, one Illinois boy’s attempt at the famous “triple dog dare” frozen pole scene failed miserably.

Eleven-year-old Spencer Cline ended up frantically begging for help, just like in the movie, after he stuck his tongue to a frozen pole. Making it even more similar to the movie was that his friend, 12-year-old Cole Leeper, thought Spencer was putting on an act.

“He thought that my tongue wasn’t actually stuck to the pole and he couldn’t hear me,” Spencer told ABC News. “He couldn’t understand what I was trying to say.”

But unlike in the classic film, Cole actually helped by searching for hot water and rushing to a nearby neighbor for help. The stunned neighbor called 911, where an equally surprised operator fielded the call.

“And his tongue’s stuck to the metal post?” the dispatcher asked. “Yeah,” the neighbor responded, laughing.

Spencer eventually managed to free himself after about six minutes stuck on the pole, before paramedics arrived — but at a painful price.

“It really hurt and I would never do it again,” he said.