‘Shazam’ Star Zachary Levi Reveals Mental Health Struggles That Landed Him in Psych Ward

Zachary Levi has revealed he experienced a “complete mental breakdown” five years ago and considered suicide. The Shazam! star is releasing a memoir called Radical Love: Learning to Accept Yourself and Others on June 28. Levi describes in the book the long path he took to learn to love himself fully and accept himself as he suffered from anxiety, depression, and a low sense of self-worth due to being raised in an abusive and complex home.

Ahead of the book’s launch by Harper Horizon, Levi joined veteran journalist Elizabeth Vargas for a candid conversation about these topics on her Heart of the Matter podcast for Partnership to End Addiction, which releases on June 28.”I’ve struggled with this stuff most of my life. I didn’t realize that I was struggling with these things until I was 37, about five years ago, and I had a complete mental breakdown,” Levi explained before discussing the struggles he experienced growing up in a complicated family.

“The majority of my life, I grew up in a household where my stepfather was a perfectionist on the highest of levels, his bar was so high, was impossible to reach, and then a mother who was a borderline personality,” he continued. “So, she didn’t have an impossibly high bar. She had an impossible target because it kept moving.” Levi said that when his mother was in a bad mood, “it was the end of the world. I was an embarrassment to the family. I mean, it was lots of vitriol, lots of yelling.”

Levi became increasingly dependent on substances and vices as he grew older. “I was running to lots of other things, whether it was sex or drugs or booze or things to distract me from, to numb myself from the pain that I was running away from most of my life,” he said. “The irony is that booze can give you this temporary relief, but then the next day amplifies that anxiety tenfold. So, then you’re running back to get more, and it just becomes this vicious cycle.”

Levi’s career also contributed to his self-doubt. At one point, he believed moving to Austin and building a studio would give meaning to his life. “My career was in a place where I felt like even though I had accomplished so many things up to that point, I was still, and to be honest, even now, I still feel this way. I feel like I’m a bit on the outside looking in.”

After moving to Austin, Levi revealed he had difficulty doing mundane tasks such as unpacking and choosing a restaurant. Feelings of despair, self-hatred, and anxiety led to an emotional crisis.”I’m sitting in my truck, and vividly, I remember I was holding on to the wheel, and I was just shaking back and forth, that like almost trying to shake myself out of what it was going on, and I’m just weeping. I’m just crying. I’m like, ‘God, help me.’”

He recalled how he ended up in the emergency room after becoming suicidal. “I was having very active thoughts of ending my life,” he revealed. “It wasn’t the first time I had had them. I had been in dark places in my life before, but I guess in those moments, I had people around me. I had foolishly, I mean, I think I made the right choice in moving to Austin…I didn’t have a support structure. … So, in this particular moment, I’m out here in this wonderful city, but basically by myself, and the darkness surrounds me again. The lies are whispering into my ear and the failure that I felt that I was, was enough to be like, ‘Zach, it doesn’t feel like you’re going to make it out of this.’” On the recommendation of a “dear friend,” he sought treatment at a psych ward, where he participated in “life-saving, intensive therapy.”

Although Levi has dealt with his issues, he still lives with them. However, he manages with a healthy diet, regular exercise, and sleep. “Prayer and meditation are very important, which are also somewhat synonymous, I think, in some ways. Sometimes my prayer is meditation.”

“I think one of the most important things, at least for me, is taking my thoughts captive,” he added. “Our minds are so powerful, but they are so easily, so easily hijacked if we don’t really go, ‘Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I’m doing it again. I’m starting to speak ill of myself again. I’m starting to be harsh or critical of myself. I’m starting to judge where I’m at in my life.’”

If you or someone you know is in crisis, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or contact the Crisis Text Line by texting TALK to 741-741.