‘The Voice’ Alum Billy Gilman Releases Emotional ‘Soldier’ Video About Personal Struggles

When Billy Gilman tried out for The Voice in 2016, he had already had a successful career in country music, which began when he was just a child. But the early hits weren’t enough to protect him from unfair treatment and unexpected backlash when he came out several years later as gay. Gilman, now 31, is opening up about those dark times, which he reflected on in his latest single and video, “Soldier.”

“Everyone has their own problems in this world, but I think when I tell you it got dark, I think people know where I’m going when I say those words,” Gilman admitted to PEOPLE. “It was scary. God put me on this Earth to be one thing and no one was allowing me to do it and it was crazy.”

In the “Soldier” video, Gilman shows people overcoming sometimes seemingly impossible struggles, including bullying, drug addiction and homelessness.

“These are real problems that we see on the news but I haven’t seen a music video that touches it in that way,” Gilman acknowledged. “If the song can inspire and help someone else in such a strong way, the song is just gold to me.”

The Rhode Island native struggled to find his place after he felt shunned by country music, revealing that he even felt suicidal, but was saved by the love of his adoring mother.

“I just knew I couldn’t do that to her because she’s my life,” Gilman said. “I just kept seeing my mom’s face so that really kept me from being very off the edge. But it was scary … It’s a very heavy feeling.”

Although Gilman didn’t reveal his sexual identity until 2014, shortly after Ty Herndon also came out, he was told he had a “gay vibe” which is why he struggled to find a place in country music.

“And I’m thinking to myself, the music is all that should matter. Not this,” Gilman recalled. “I had a VP of one of the most major record labels sit down and say to me ‘Well, we don’t like our men sounding like Carrie Underwood.’”

“So not only is that a gay thing,” he added, “but it was also an effeminate thing.”

While Gilman is releasing “Soldier” to pop radio, he makes it clear that it wasn’t his decision to switch genres.

“As a child, it was almost like being pulled out of a family,” Gilman noted. “It’s insane … The sad thing is I never chose to leave country music, they left me.”

It wasn’t until Gilman appeared on The Voice in 2016, on Adam Levin’s team, that he found he had more to say in music, and an avenue in which to say it.

“I think they saw through that and they saw the vulnerability at the heart. That’s what really helped me create the new music and new sound. I knew that my voice fit that,” said the singer. “I’m very proud of the stuff that I’ve been able to do. And that was because of The Voice. And probably because America could have easily gone, ‘Nah, we liked him before when he was doing this,’ but they didn’t.”

Gilman hopes that with “Soldier,” he can inspire others, who may be struggling in similar ways than he once did.

“When you’re at the frontlines, that’s scary,” Gilman noted. “And changing the world like that, and for someone that chooses to come to me and say, ‘You helped fight for all of us.’ I’m just honored that I, in some way, can do it.”

Photo Credit: Getty / Paul Archuleta