Hayden Panettiere is opening up about the toll filming the popular TV drama Nashville took on her emotional well-being and mental health, calling the experience “very traumatizing.” The actress, 34, spoke candidly about her time playing Juliette Barnes during an interview with The Messenger ahead of her A Conversation With Hayden Panettiere tour, saying it was difficult to see her own experiences with alcohol and depression reflected in her character.ย
The Heroes alum, who has been open about using opioids and alcohol as early as her teen years, said she “felt like I was acting out my own life” as her character’s storyline went down those same roads, even following her struggles with postpartum depression after her daughter was born. “Straight from the beginning, it was like, I’m dating a football player, [and then] Juliette dates a football player. And then they turned her into an alcoholic,” Panettiere explained. “Then they turned to her leaving her daughter and going to this crazy [place] in Europe, and it was very obvious … They weren’t doing their homework. They weren’t creating new storylines. They were just looking at my life and going, ‘Oh, let’s just take what she’s going through and put our little spin on it.’ And then, ta-da! It’s done and done.”
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Working 12- to 20-hour days on set wasn’t helpful for Panettiere’s health either. “I didn’t have time to take care of myself [and] to think about and go through the pain I was experiencing physically [and] emotionally. I just wanted to drum it out and watch mindless television and great shows,” she recalled. “Anything to keep my mind off of that because I knew that next day I was going to be back at it again. I was like, tear-central. I don’t even think on a soap opera that I cried as much [as I did] on Nashville.”
Panettiere previously shared with Women’s Health in March 2023 more about her experience with postpartum depression, saying she suffered “extreme hopelessness” after the birth of her daughter. “I should have gone on antidepressants [to cope with the postpartum depression], but you have to find the right one that works for you,” she told the outlet. “They don’t mix well with alcohol, and I wasn’t ready to stop drinking.”
After undergoing treatment in 2015 and 2021, Panettiere said she eventually felt like she had “this blank canvas” to work with in her recovery, both physically and mentally. “My body still didn’t feel like it belonged to me,” the actress said about deciding to get a breast reduction in November 2022. “I don’t think there’s anything wrong with somebody who wants to tweak something if it makes them feel more confident. That’s all I have to say about it. My confidence is back.”