Cheryl Burke spoke about her first-hand experience with sexual assault on Red Table Talk’s Nov. 2 episode. From age five, Burke was groomed and molested by her babysitter, who was a family friend and retired mailman in his late 60s, hired by her stepfather. “It was more of a grooming experience, the Dancing with the Stars pro said. Because it wasn’t intercourse. It was other–you know, stuff that happened, sexual acts–but I never physically felt hurt. Like, there was moments–and I’m gonna say it now, it didn’t feel bad. It was actually intimate. He was grooming me, and he was my definition of love.”
She noted that the abuse and her father’s cheating warped her understanding of love and relationships. “This is what love equaled, right? Seeing my father’s infidelity being abused by this old retired mailman, and I didn’t really know what a ‘healthy’ relationship is or was. There wasn’t a stable father figure in my life. It’s like brainwashing at those moments in your childhood when it really matters. So this happened for many years and no one said anything, other than my older sister’s friend who did the right thing, ran home to her parents, and told them, and then they contacted my family. And I actually testified against him at nine, I believe.”
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Burke, 38, later appeared in court against the neighbor, who was sentenced to 20 years behind bars after he was caught attempting to molest her friend. As Pinkett-Smith responded with a simple “Wow,” Burke remarked, “Timeline is not great with trauma.” The Dance Moms alum first revealed in TLC’s 2015 documentary Breaking the Silence that she had endured sexual abuse. “I couldn’t speak up for myself,” she recalled. “It was hard for me to say no. In a weird way, it was like I didn’t want to hurt him.”
Burke’s claims of abuse shocked the Red Table Talk panel, but she later discussed other experiences she had in the past, including facing domestic violence as a teen. “Not to get too graphic, but in high school — I’ll never forget, the person I was with on and off for about four years whipped me with a belt,” she shared. “And I had bruises all over my legs. “I remember his parents were watching it, didn’t do anything,” she continued. “And it wasn’t like he was hitting me, he was whipping me.”
Recently, Burke and her husband Matthew Lawrence finalized their divorce. Previously, she described the former couple’s relationship as the only one that “did not fit this abusive pattern” she had experienced. “He is the complete opposite of everything bad about my past relationships,” she said of Lawrence, 42, in a 2020 YouTube video. “I think when I look back on this time in my life, I could sit here and say that I wish these things had never happened to me, but I look at it now as every part of my story has helped me to become the woman I am today.”