New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft has been charged in a prostitution sting, and the day spa involved is now being spammed with fake reviews.
Following news that Florida police are issuing a warrant for Kraft’s arrest in connection to a human trafficking investigation, the Orchids of Asia Day Spa & Massage business in Jupiter, Florida has found itself receiving a number of false Google reviews attributed to Kraft.
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“Robert Kraft here. I just wanted to say that if you’re looking for a premium spa experience, this is the place to go. Completely legitimate business, and they dont cut corners from both heads to toe. I have to say my experience was excellent, and they were extremely hands-on during the process, getting every inch of my body to feel like I was 18 again,” one fake review read. “God Bless the Patriots. God Bless America. God Bless Orchids of Asia Day Spa.”
“‘Much better than Mar-a-Lago Day Spa. Quick-e Mart next door has 2 Gatorade for $3, and there’s a vape shop and tat parlor nearby too – NICE! I always think of Ricki Noel when I’m here. So, ya, 2 stars’ – Rob Kraft, famous person,” another review joked.
“When I first entered I noticed Patriots paraphernalia everywhere, which I thought was weird. I wondered where all the Dolphins stuff was. Then as I was walking to my private room I saw a woman wearing a Tom Brady jersey deflating a bunch of footballs and packing them in boxes for shipping. Super weird, right? Other than that the massage was ok, I guess. Highly recommend for Patriots fans,” a satirical one-star critique stated.
Kraft isn’t the only Patriot being lampooned in the fake reviews, as one by a faux-Tom Brady reads, “Came here with my boss after a big day at work. He said his buddy Donny used to bring him here all the time. I’m all for a great massage, but I don’t even let my wife go the places these people went. As soon as I laid on my stomach, I couldn’t help but notice that the hands of the masseuse felt old and wrinkled. They also kept referring to me as their ‘perfect little boy.’ [I don’t know], might come back.”
Interestingly, one review from two years ago revealed that the author had suspicions that the Orchids of Asia Day Spa “is more of a happy ending kind of place.”
“Evident they have no formal training,” the writer added, then stating that the masseuse told him she only gets paid in tips.
Kraft has since denied the being involved in the crime, saying through a spokesperson, “We categorically deny that Mr. Kraft engaged in any illegal activity. Because it is a judicial matter, we will not be commenting further.”
Photo credit: Orchids of Asia Day Spa
