Contrary to what porn tells us, not all women are able to orgasm after 2.5 seconds of minimal touching and a quick boob grab. In fact, 33% of women have trouble reaching orgasm during sex, and around 80% have difficult orgasming just from vaginal sex, according to a study done by Planned Parenthood. While these figures might seem scary, much of the difficulty women have in reaching orgasm is tied back to a lack of preparation, aka foreplay and stimulation, aka clitoral play.
As the saying goes, women are like ovens: we need a little time to heat up before we can get cooking. But to truly ensure the most pleasurable path to that magic O moment, women also need to ensure their partners understand not just where to touch, but how to touch, because, as it turns out, there are specific kinds of foreplay and clitoral stimulation that are more likely to bring a woman to orgasm.
What are these ways? As expected, oral sex is hands-down the best foreplay to include in your bedroom activities. Why, you might ask? Because your partner can focus all their attention on your clitoris, which, as we know, not only makes it easier for women to orgasm, but also enhances orgasms. Just make sure your partner knows their stuff (or, teach them!) and doesn’t make any mistakes that might ruin your orgasm.
If oral isn’t your thing, though, never fear. Genital touching in general increases your arousal and, as we all know from masturbation, a finger is all you need to find your bliss. If you’re looking for some cold, hard facts about which kind of touching works you up the most, check out the July 2017 Indiana University study done in collaboration with OMGYes. This study found that most women prefer direct clitoral stimulation following an up-and-down motion on the clitoris, in addition to some form of stimulation to the area surrounding the clitoris. For those women who preferred indirect clitoral stimulation, the majority wanted that touching focused “through the skin above the hood”, aka that sweet spot right above the clitoris.
We couldn’t conclude this article without mentioning that old stand-by, the makeout. In addition to warding off infections, reducing stress, boosting your mood, increasing adrenaline and releasing neurotransmitters that make you feel all warm and fuzzy, kissing is a great way to increase arousal. Deep kissing has been found to increase the likelihood of orgasm, so include some heavy makeouts before you hop under the sheets.
Everyone is different, so what works for the majority of women might not work for you. Find the foreplay and stimulation that work best for you, and above all, don’t stress about the O. Sex is about pleasure, and that pleasure can happen with, and without, that final climax.
Article written by: Emily Keyes. Follow her here.
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