Britney Spears spoke directly about her conservatorship battle for the first time publicly in an address to a Los Angeles judge on Wednesday, June 23, dropping a number of bombshell revelations about the trauma she’s experienced since being placed under the legal and financial control of her father in 2008.
The pop star, 39, called out dad Jamie Spears and alleged disturbing stories about her treatment over the years, saying there was nothing she wanted more than to end the conservatorship and get back to the life she wanted to live. Following Britney Spears‘ claims, Jamie Spears’ attorney said in a statement to the judge, “He is sorry to see his daughter suffering and in so much pain. Mr. Spears loves his daughter and misses her very much.” Keep scrolling to read some of the biggest revelations from the hearing.
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She’s Depressed
While Spears has put on a positive front for social media since the start of the #FreeBritney movement, she admitted publicly that she is not OK and “not happy.” The singer told the judge, “I’ve lied and told the whole world I’m OK, and I’m happy. It’s a lie.”
“I thought, just maybe if I said that enough, maybe I might become happy because I’ve been in denial. I’ve been in shock. I am traumatized. You know, fake it till you make it,” she explained of her mindset over the years. “But now I’m telling you the truth, OK. I’m not happy. I can’t sleep. I’m so angry, it’s insane and I’m depressed. I cry every day.”
Her Dad Should “Be in Jail”
Calling out her father and “anyone involved in this conservatorship” and her management, Spears candidly told the judge “they should be in jail.” She claimed the conservatorship has “given these people I’ve worked for way too much control,” including a forced rehab stay, which cost her $60,000 per month.
When she would cry on the phone to her father, Spears claimed he “loved every minute of it.” Comparing her situation to sex trafficking, she said of Jamie, “The control he had over someone as powerful as me, as he loved the control to hurt his own daughter 100,000 percent.”
She Was Forced to Take Lithium
Spears also claimed she was forced to take lithium when she expressed a desire to change things with her Las Vegas residency, which was eventually canceled. “Three days later after I said no to Vegas, my therapist sat me down in a room and said he had a million phone calls about how I was not cooperating in rehearsals and I haven’t been taking my medication. All of this was false,” the star alleged. “He immediately, the next day, put me on lithium.”
“Out of nowhere, he took me off my normal meds I’d been on for five years,” she continued. “And lithium is a very, very strong, and completely different medication compared to what I was used to.” Spears said the medication made her feel “drunk” and she felt she couldn’t speak to her parents about her concerns with the medication.
Why She Didn’t Speak Out
Spears said she didn’t speak out publicly before because she feared she wouldn’t be believed. “I honestly don’t think anyone would believe me, to be honest with you,” she told the judge, saying she thought “people would make fun of me or laugh at me and say, ‘She’s lying. She’s got everything. She’s Britney Spears.’”
“I’m not lying. I just want my life back and it’s been 13 years and it’s enough,” she continued. It had been “a long time since I’ve owned my money, and it’s my wish and my dream for all of this to end without being tested again,” Spears added.
Her Reproductive Rights Are in Question
Spears also claimed that her reproductive rights were being violated, as she has not been permitted to have her IUD removed so that she would be able to have more children. “I want to be able to get married and have a baby,” said Spears, who said she was prevented by the conservatorship from moving on in her relationship with longtime boyfriend Sam Asghari. “I was told right now, in the conservatorship, I’m not able to get married or have a baby.”
“I’m tired of feeling alone. I deserve to have the same rights as anybody does by having a child, a family, any of those things,” she added.
She Wants to Sue Her Family
Spears said she wants to be able to continue to speak her truth, even if that means taking legal action against her family. “I would honestly like to sue my family, to be totally honest with you,” Spears said. “I also would like to be able to share my story with the world, and what they did to me, instead of it being a hush-hush secret to benefit all of them.”
She said while she hasn’t been permitted to do interviews with members of the press, she feels like it’s important for her to be able to express herself. “I want to be able to be heard on what they did to me. By making me keep this in for so long, is not good for my heart,” she said. “I’ve been so angry and I cry every day, it concerns me. I’m told I’m not allowed to expose the people who did this to me. For my sanity, I need you, the judge, to approve me to do an interview where I can be heard on what they did to me.”
She Wants to Take a Break
If her conservatorship is terminated, Spears said she wants to be able to take a break and simply live her life the way she wants without being controlled by a team. “I deserve to have a life. I’ve worked my whole life, I deserve to have a two to three-year break and just, you know, do what I want to do,” she told the judge.
“I want changes and I want changes going forward. I deserve changes. I was told I have to sit down and be evaluated,” Spears said. “I don’t think I owe anyone, to be evaluated. I’ve done more than enough. I don’t feel like I should even be in the room with anyone to offend me by trying to question my capacity of intelligence.”
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