Demi Lovato has been candid about her struggles with body image, and during an appearance on Ashley Graham‘s Pretty Big Deal podcast this week, she insinuated that a relapse into her eating disorder was one factor that led to her July 2018 overdose.
“I’m tired of running myself into the ground with workouts and extreme dieting,” Lovato said. “I thought the past few years was recovery from an eating disorder, when it actually was just completely falling into it. And I just realized that, like, maybe my symptoms weren’t as obvious as before, but it was definitely an eating issue.”
Videos by PopCulture.com
“I think when you have certain people around you that are telling you certain things, that you should look a certain way, it makes it harder,” she continued. “I was in that situation, and I was just running myself into the ground. And I honestly think that’s kind of what led to everything happening over the past year. [It] was just, like, me thinking I found recovery when I didn’t, and then living this kind of lie and trying to tell the world I was happy with myself when I really wasn’t.”
Lovato overdosed in July 2018 and was rushed to the hospital, where she stayed for a short time before going to rehab. This year, Lovato returned to music with a performance at the Grammys last month one week before she sang the national anthem at the Super Bowl. The 27-year-old told Graham that when she does release a new album, she plans to prioritize her mental health.
“I made a choice going into this next album, like, all right, when I present this, I’m not going to worry what I look like, you know?” she said. “I’m not going to worry about looking a certain way or fit a certain mold or whatever. Like, that’s just not who I am. Someone needs to stand up to people who don’t naturally look that way.”
“I had to work my aโ off every day in the gym, six days a week, to, like, maintain that figure,” the Texas native continued. “And it’s just like โฆ That led me only one way. And I don’t want to go down that path again. So I’m not willing to destroy my mental health to look a certain way anymore.””
“Why live that life if it’s a lie?” she said. “I just decided not to live that lie anymore.”
Photo Credit: Getty / Rachel Murray