YouTube star Myka Stauffer is admitting that she feels like a failure as a mom after she and husband James Stauffer found a new home for their son, Huxley, just three years after adopting him from China. In a video, she explained how after multiple recommendations from medical professionals, they felt it was best that he find a better “forever home” so that he can truly thrive. However, her incredibly tough decision did not come without backlash.
“You guys have been part of this adoption journey even before we picked up Huxley, throughout the whole process,” James started while his wife was in tears in a YouTube video. “With international adoption, sometimes there are unknowns and things that are not transparent on files and things like that.” He continued, “Once Huxley came home, there were a lot more special needs that we weren’t aware of and that we were not told. So over the past few years, Huxley has been in numerous therapies to try and help him with all of his needs. Over the last year has been the more intense therapy to try and help him as much as possible. For us, it’s been really hard hearing from the medical professionals. A lot of their feedback [has been] really upsetting for us, because it’s not what we ever wanted to hear. We never wanted to be in this position, and we’ve been trying to get his needs met and help him out as much as possible. We truly love him.”
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Stauffer then chimed in and said, “There’s not an ounce of our body that doesn’t love Huxley with all of our being. There wasn’t a minute that [we] didn’t try our hardest. And I think that James is trying to say is that after multiple assessments, after multiple evaluations, numerous medical professionals have felt that he needed a different fit and that [with] his medical needs, he needed more.” However, that did not go over well with her fans. Though she waited a while to share the news with her followers and even clarified that he is absolutely loving his new family, the couple still received a lot of backlash, accusing them of just giving up on a child.
“Okay but this myka stauffer stuff makes me really sad bc I’ve watched her since before she adopted Huxley and when I watched the video it made absolutely NO sense? Your child was too hard to handle? So you…. gave him back? Like…. a gift receipt. That poor sweet thing,” someone wrote. Another person commented saying, “Here’s the thing…those of us with autistic kids? WE HAD NO IDEA WE WERE GOING TO HAVE THEM. We figured it out. We advocated. We learned. We showed up for our kids.”
Stauffer says she already feels a horrible amount of guilt for their decision, even feeling like a failed mom. “Do I feel like a failure as a mom? Like, 500 percent,” she said. “So when I get insidious hurtful comments, it just like, really makes it hurt worse. It’s not about me at all, but … the last couple of months have been the hardest thing I could’ve ever imagined.” However, despite the negative comments, there were still plenty of fans who came to her defense.