12 Hilarious Ways School Sex Ed Failed Curious Kids Everywhere

​

On sex:

"It was never discussed that the penis moved during intercourse, so my young mind pictured a man inserting his penis into the vagina and then it just sat there motionless until an 'ejaculation,' which was also never explained." -runswithpaper

"[The teacher] went through the course material and the science of sex and then asked if there were any questions. There was a long moment of silence, then one boy asked, 'What does it feel like when a man ejaculates?' She blushed, stammered a bit and then said, 'Well, I obviously don't know, but some of my friends that are guys have told me it feels a lot like peeing.'

...We talked about it later amongst ourselves at recess and one of the boys was concerned that when he would have sex he wouldn't be able to ejaculate. We all decided that it would probably be a good idea to just pee a little bit in the girl if that happened and it would probably feel the same to us and to the girl, too." - srv656s

"My school had a superhero named Abstinence Man... That should explain enough." -

​

"The teacher handed out cucumbers and had us put condoms on it, with the qualifier, 'Girls, cucumbers are not to scale.'" - alphawolf29

"7th grade back in 2002, we were taught 'ATM ' or 'abstinence 'til marriage.' Public school. They even gave us little "ATM" cards to carry around until we got married."- Gusterr

"I knew that you had sex basically laying on top of each other, so I couldn't figure out how a penis could fit into a vagina that way. It didn't seem to be like the angles would work out. What were the logistics? Nobody ever told me. I obviously figured it out on my own." - 101033

"It failed to teach me what sex was at all. Sperm meets egg...but how the heck does that even happen? Took a year or two to find out how that works from other sources." -

​

On vaginas and periods:

"At first, I didn't realize the female body has three holes and was thoroughly confused by tampon use. How does one go pee when they have a tampon in?" - anaelle13

"I didn't know what discharge was and mistook it for being horny or something." - x_meh_x

"I thought my period was going to be a tiny red dot in my underwear until I got my first period." - pm_me_your_nick_cage

"I left the plastic applicator in when I first started using tampons...sucked." - emspfaery

What did sex ed fail to teach you?