The more women come to know their bodies and the more confident they become about asking for what they do (and do not) want in the bedroom, the more pleasurable sex becomes.
For anyone who doesn't quite believe that sex is one of those things that gets better with age, it's time to add some new tricks to your repertoire. Whether you're in your twenties or your forties, be prepared to have the best sex of your life.
Despite all this talk about time, try adding a couple of these tips to your next free night. After all, why wait?
To step it up from morning quickies or the normal evening sex routine, embark on a tantric experience. This practice brings spirituality into the act of love-making in order to unite body, mind and soul. Not only will you feel more connected to your partner, you'll likely have the most intense orgasm you've ever felt.
Ready to try it? Tantric sex involves mindful breathing, muscle contraction, sensation, visualization and meditation during intercourse. Put simply, it puts the "O" in Om.
And when it's over, don't forget these three crucial post-sex steps!
Take a hint from self-proclaimed ‘sex-positive couple’ Channing Tatum and Jenna Dewan Tatum and do buy the lingerie! Just don't buy what you think he will like and neglect what you feel best in.
"I think all women should keep it exciting for themselves," Jenna suggests. "People always ask, 'Do you do anything to keep it fresh for your man?' I hate that question. I'm like, ‘No. Why is it for your man?’ I do things to keep it fresh for myself. The lingerie I buy is not for him necessarily. It's for us and for myself. If you feel sexy, then it's good for you."
For more Jenna-approved sex tips, check out more here!
Face it: If your man is on top most of the time, he’s getting more pleasure than you. Missionary isn't an ideal position for women as your guy isn't able to fully enter you, and your g-spot won't be found from this angle.
The solution for this problem is simple, though: bring in a pillow! Prop your pelvis with a pillow or two to lift your lower body and have him try again. You'll feel deeper penetration and he'll find it a bit easier to thrust.
Another expert tip during 'lifted' missionary is to gently press on your lower stomach with one hand. Why? Because the extra bit of pressure feels incredible.
Before you skip this step (rookie move), know that the power of touch is highly underrated. Warm up by giving a neck and shoulder massage with these tips, then move on to the lower body to open his 'sexual energy.'
Rock his hips side to side by pressing the palms down on the hips. Resist the urge to get to anything sexual and skip down to his feet! Gently press into the side of his arches with your thumb, quickly moving up and down the arch line one tiny press at a time. Stretch and pull at his toes. If you have a warm, steamy towel, wrap this around his feet. Having generous blood flow through the entire body will promote the sensuality.
Annnnd now you can get to doing the deed.
Don't be afraid to unleash your inner cowgirl; it's your best bet for orgasm, so what's holding you back?
Any seasoned sex-doer knows that girl-on-top position is nothing like it looks in the movies (rom-com or otherwise). This position is much slower and more sensual; it's more of a grind than a bounce.
If you need specifics on how girl-on-top is really supposed to work, we've got you covered here.
Hear us out. Instead of simply focusing your breathing, close your eyes and visualize breathing into and out of your vagina.
"The effect is a strong increase in sexual desire in the body," says Brandy Engler, a Los Angeles-based psychologist and sextherapist, to Women’s Health. "I found doing this exercise for 10 to 20 minutes almost always creates sexual energy. It helps women take responsibility for their libido, so they feel they have more to bring to the bedroom and are less dependent on their partner to bring the excitement."
Breathing and focus has the added benefit of getting you relaxed, which is a key ingredient for the biggest 'O.'
No, this isn't a PSA advocating your own DIY adult film (unless you're into that)... We're talking about a mirror! Rearrange the bedroom to have the mirror over your dresser in a strong spot or invest in a floor-length mirror to see your nights of passion from every angle.
Seeing yourself in a sexy way firsthand is, well, incredibly hot. It also gives you a stronger visual reminder of what sex is like with your partner, making those nights away a little less lonely.
While many hail the clitoris as a magic button, it's a little more complicated than that. The clitoris is a wishbone-shaped structure under both sides of the labia, and some areas are more sensitive than others. Sex therapists recommend focusing on the 'one o'clock' spot just to the left of the exposed clitoris since it is reported to be super sensitive. Wish, granted.
And don't forget the other super sensitive spot you possess ~within~! Taking time to explore your vagina and trying to locate the seemingly-mythical G-spot can get you more in tune with your own body. It's easier to search for it yourself when you're turned on; just apply some lube and use two fingers to follow the top vaginal wall about two inches. It will feel a little more spongy and may be more sensitive to stimulation. G marks the spot!
You are no longer an egotistical teenager, so get smart and recognize that a life without lube is no life at all. We really can't say this enough—lube is a woman's best friend.
Extra lubrication can add a level of heat and pleasure to any sex position and can make up the difference for women who don't get wet enough on their own (which is most women, by the way!).
We know what you're thinking: haven't we outgrown hand jobs? Nope. With lube and a little skill, a hand job can be incredibly sexy and it's a great way to take full control of your partner's pleasure.
First off, lube it up, then hold his shaft firmly with both hands, interlacing your fingers, and apply pressure while you stroke up and down.
And if you're more into 'mutual pleasure,' turn up the heat with this handjob while facing away from your guy, giving him an exciting view and allowing him to put his hands on/in you, too! This fun little act gives new meaning to the phrase 'working together.'
Photo Credit: Shutterstock / VGstockstudio