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How to Show Love to Your Partner Without Saying It

holding-hands
(Photo: iStock)

Though it’s valuable and essential to use our words for providing reassurance to loved ones, love is largely communicated with our actions. And as an active verb, it requires energy, creativity, and a whole lot of sentiment that can be conveyed through affection to strengthen a relationship.

There are many ways to say “I love you” without ever saying it because actions do speak louder than words.

Make Time

We're all busy we spend our whole lives to being busy by tending to important tasks and meetings, but it is essential to create time for those you love. When you become a parent, the luxury of “couple time” tends to disappear with the children’s socks every week.

Life post-kids can be hard, so be sure to explore little things together. Take up a hobby, enroll in a class, or even play hooky from chores — whatever the case, pursue an activity you both enjoy.

Become an effective listener

From getting our jobs done to maintaining personal relationships, listening is a critical skill in all aspects of our lives. To become a better partner and truly communicate beyond speech, become an effective communicator by blending empathy with active listening. As a technique valuable in strengthening a relationship, being an active and empathic listener means you aren't drifting off to la-la-land and your face is not reminiscent of a confused emoji.

Studies prove “active empathetic listening” shows how well you can sense, process and respond when you listen to your partner. By asking questions, you allow yourself to understand what goes on in the mind of the speaker as if you were them. When you engage in this kind of listening, you do more than hear what the other is saying — you show you know how the other person feels, and that is immensely affectionate.

Show affection

One of the best ways to illustrate those three pretty words is to show your significant other some affection. The warmth of kisses and hugs are the best way to convey a feeling. That said, it doesn’t have to be so much that it makes people cringe in public. It can be a good morning hug, a peck on the cheek or holding hands when running errands — a little goes a long way.

If you want to kick it up a notch, researchers say expressing that you want your partner differs from saying "I love you," as it signifies choice. You chose your partner because you want them and this "in-the-moment" form of communication can be a real turn on.

Be supportive

When you truly love someone, you will consistently support them. It's usually not up to us to decide whether our partner's dreams and goals are practical or not. If something makes them genuinely happy to pursue, like a career in sports or the arts, evaluate your own heart and prioritize encouraging their dreams.

This is the biggest gesture of love and one they will truly appreciate. If they falter, remind them why they started in the first place and be a sounding board who understands their feelings.

Random surprise

We all love surprises! And when you’re an active listener and support someone wholly, your surprises for them will be one of the most well-appreciated gestures of affection.

Whether it’s a care package, a note slipped under their pillow, a website you built for their passion project, or even a dinner by candlelight — saying, “I love you” through a random surprise lets your partner know that you’re thinking of them. With the nanosecond lifestyle we live in, anything unplanned is über romantic because it took extra effort to make them feel that special.