Why Randy Orton Can't Wait to Get Fat

Some WWE Superstars have 1 quality that stands out above the rest. For the Rock, it was his magnetic charisma. For AJ Styles, it's his in-ring proficiency. For Cesaro, it's his raw power. But for Randy Orton, it's his body.

And the 13-time WWE champion is over it.

At 6' 5" 250 lbs, Randy Orton has a body that looks like it was hand sculpted by Vince McMahon himself. However to Orton, maintaining his best tool at the age of 37 has become an exhausting task. He opened up about his strife on E&C's Pod of Awesomeness.

"I'm always up and down when it comes to my body," Orton revealed. "It's stressful, it is."

Orton admitted that being injured is the quickest way for him to slip out of peak physical condition. That, and he has a particularly insatiable sweet tooth. Edge and Christian emphasized and Orton pointed to Kevin Owens as some who has it made.

"I guess Kevin Owens has it figured out. He started fat and he'll finish fat. He's trying to get himself over as the fat guy that can fight. Bless his heart, that's great. I'm jealous," said Orton.

This may be the quote of 2017. Bless Randy Orton for being so honest, and so accurate. As a heel, the less attractive Kevin Owens is, the better. But Orton thinks KO is ahead of the game and when it comes time for Orton to turn back to his naturally heelish ways, he may start pounding cookies and cupcakes.

"I love it and I'm gonna use that, hopefully, sooner than later when I turn heel again because I'm sick of this babyface thing, that's for sure," Orton said.

A fat Randy Orton could be the best thing in WWE since Ladder Matches. Frankly, as one of WWE's most consistent and decorated employees of the last 15 years, Orton has earned the right to get chunky - if he chooses to do so.

As long as he can still hit the RKO, who cares if he's 400 lbs?

Regardless of weight, WWE is currently indebted to Orton. Having lost 3 consecutive pay-per-view matches to Jinder Mahal, surely Orton has placed himself in the crosshairs of good wrestling karma. The future WWE Hall of Famer is one of the few proven main event talents on the SmackDown roster and it's time to resume his role at WWE's top.